The Thief

     

   There she stood in her princess dress.  She had spent the morning twirling, curtseying, singing into her microphone and pushing her puppy in the "princess carriage" aka the baby doll stroller.  She now stood still with a sunken look on her face.  I ask her what is wrong and she says "I am not the real snow white because the real snow white has a red headband and I don't have a red head band." I go to her hair bow drawer and pull out a gold headband and a turquoise headband "but mommy those aren't red." I am just about to explain that we can pretend they are red when she whizzes by me grabs her brothers toboggan and proudly exclaims "now I am a princess." 


          In that moment I breathe a sigh of relief and thank God that she is 3 and she is able to use her imagination and pretend.  I also feel a pain in my stomach and heart as I think of all the comparison that is to come in her life in the not so far away future.  Comparison...it is the thief that steals our joy. Comparison is what stole her moments of twirling and caused her to pause and realize that she was missing something, albeit a red headband but it was something and it took away her fun, if only for a moment, and made her feel as though she wasn't measuring up. 


          I use my 3 year old as an example of how comparison stole her joy but how many times have you and I let comparison cause us to forget our blessings and wish we had, looked like, were doing something that someone else had or was.  It is spending a solid 10 minutes airing up a pool raft for my child to have it popped in 3 seconds.  My lungs are still aching from airing it up and the fun of the pool raft is gone immediately.  The deflating feeling that comparison causes you to feel is pure misery. 
   
       I want my daughter to be original.  I want my daughter to be confident and joyful in her shoes.  Wishing you were in someone else's shoes is a sure way to live a miserable life. Comparison causes us to hit the pause button, to stop living our lives and using our blessings and instead we are in the same spot sulking wishing for more when amazing things are right in front of us.   I know there will be days when comparison steals her joy or my joy or your joy but may we all wake up from our self doubt and count our blessings and be thankful and grateful and live life to the fullest.  May we ditch the red headband, find a crazy toboggan and celebrate life, our life!

Slipping Through Our Fingers

               

      I've never been a big New Years Eve fan, I go to bed early and wake up early so staying up until the clock strikes midnight is a form of torture for me.  This year we planned to have a family night in with movies, chili, and pajamas.  Meritt was upstairs playing, the chili was simmering on the stove, I was unloading the dishwasher (with my 7 month old assistant, Wells), and Brian was gathering the trash to take it outside.  Meritt yells from upstairs "I pee peed" we say good job, or something to that effect, Brian goes outside and I hear a noise just over our dishwasher.  I look at Wells who is standing at the dishwasher and is being showered with water, it takes me a few seconds to realize that this water is coming from our ceiling.  I run outside yell at Brian to come in and when I step back in the kitchen I see that water is now pouring from the ceiling above the stovetop as well, our chili on the stovetop is being showered with water from our upstairs bathroom...YUCK!


         Brian runs upstairs turns the water off and it still takes a good 10-15 minutes for all the water to drain down out of our ceiling.  Ends up Meritt used almost an entire roll of toilet paper when she went to the restroom causing the toilet to back up and shower our kitchen.  We often refer to ourselves as the Griswold's, once the water was turned off and Brian came downstairs we grabbed towels began cleaning the kitchen and laughing that our chili was ruined, our kitchen ceiling was now discolored and that we were having a rockin new years eve. 


      This past Sunday, one of my girlfriends sent me a text that it was 4 years ago Sunday that I was pregnant with Meritt and we were having her gender reveal party.  She then said "where has the time gone?" I replied  "it is slipping through our fingers".  My friend and I have had many conversations over the last few years about how quickly our kids are growing and how we sometimes wish we could hit the pause button. 

      If only life were like the water gushing through our kitchen ceiling.  If only we could run to the water valve and turn it off.  If only we could stop time and relish in the moments for just a little longer.  My kids lives are like water that has been poured in the palms of my hands it is slipping through my fingers no matter how tightly I squeeze. 

      Life moves fast, the days are long and the years, gosh, the years they are so short.  The time we can't get back, the memories will last, so I press on taking an obscene amount of pictures and trying to carve into my brain the moments that I will so desperately miss.  I still find myself squeezing my fingers tight and hoping that if I squeeze tight enough I can pause time for just a moment.