As a young girl she dreamed of many things. She would go outside, get a big bouquet of weeds and march down her pretend aisle. As she marched she sang "dun, dun du-dun" it was hard work being the bride, florist and singer but her pretend weddings were so fun. Even more fun than her pretend weddings was the daydreaming she would do of her real wedding day. She would picture the most beautiful wedding dress, the tallest of cakes, she saw the harp and all of her friends and family gathered together laughing and dancing. Everyone gathered together to watch her marry her prince charming.
Today has been a rough one. Packing lunches, getting breakfast on the table, washing little faces and calming tantrums. She makes it to work with not a minute to spare. She sits at her desk and realizes once again she left her lunch at home and has a whopping $7 in her checking account until her next pay day. She can't help but think how different life is from many of her friends.
She is in the club that she never thought she would be in...
The Single Mom Club.
A club that is anything but a club. It is a place that is often lonely and isolated. It is very hard to relate to her married friends. She goes home from an exhausting day at work and there is no one to help with kids homework, or supper or baths. No one to help support her in discipline. She is standing over the kitchen sink and zones out on her yester-years. She sees her childhood self dreaming of her wedding and her perfect life. She sees just how different life is; how much harder life is. Sometimes it would be so nice to just talk to an adult or have someone volunteer to take care of bath and bedtime.
The way she planned out her life is completely different than the reality that she is living. There are so many burdens but tonight as she stands in the doorway of her daughters room she is overwhelmed with her blessings. She watches as her daughter sleeps, her little mouth wide open her chest softly rising and falling. The blessings that these children have brought her far exceed her burdens. Life is tough but tonight she is full to the brim with joy.
To mom's like me, the one's who are blessed to be married, may we all recognize the single mothers in our life. May we love them hard and support them endlessly. Remember them and help them. Take them for coffee dates or take their kids for play dates. Call them, text them and include them. Remember that their club can be lonely and tough. As their friend look for ways to lighten their load. And always, always pray for your single mom friends!
Babbling Brooke
Monday, April 27, 2015
Tuesday, April 21, 2015
Undeserved
Have you ever done something really stupid, really horrible? Something that totally didn't deserve forgiveness; but when you least deserved it and least expected it an olive branch was extended and someone forgave you of your hurtful actions or words. I certainly have.
Eight years ago, I was working in Memphis and it had been a really rough day. You know the kind of day where you find yourself on job search websites thinking surely there is something better out there. It was a day when payroll was being reduced (again) and the expectations of the job were being increased (again). I found myself, that day, under the microscope of my boss. Pressure was being put on him so he, in turn, was putting the hammer down on me.
I was angry, tired, bitter and feeling very unappreciated. I was very happy that day when my boss told me he was leaving early. As soon as his feet hit the parking lot I went to my office sat down at my computer and began typing an email. It was a nasty email full of rants about the job but mostly criticism about my boss. My co-worker was off that day and I needed to fill him in on just how horrible our boss was being and how frustrating the day had been. After several nasty paragraphs I felt better and I hit send. I grabbed my things and left for the day.
My husband and I had just sat down to dinner when my phone started ringing. It was my boss, ugh! I say "hello" he says "we need to talk about this email you sent me." My heart starts racing, my jaw has hit the floor and sweat is beading on my forehead. I ask "what email" he says "the one about how much you dislike your job and me" I run to the computer pull up my email and check the SENT file. OH MY GOSH!!! I had been thinking about how mad I was at him that I must have typed his name in the address line instead of my coworker. I was panicked, terrified and sick!! I jump in the car and head to work terrified of what is about to happen.
Upon arrival into my boss's office I am greeted with a smile. I just decide to be as brutally honest as possible. I tell him that the email was intended for someone else, I tell him that it had been a horrible day and that there was no excuse for the nasty email. I tell him I am sorry. His response and reaction were calm. He grinned big and said that he was glad he got the email. He said it made him realize he had some things to work on and that he and I needed to work on communication better. He told me that he forgave me.
Eight years later and still I am stunned. I could have easily lost my job or been reprimanded in some way but instead I was offered forgiveness and grace. I was humiliated and embarrassed but I walked away knowing what it felt like to be forgiven of something that I didn't deserve forgiveness for. The experience has caused me to have a heart to forgive often and to love much. It has also caused me to choose my words a little more wisely and always, always make sure I am sending my email to the right person, ha! Seriously though, we are all undeserved yet we are forgiven. Today and everyday, remember to forgive those that hurt you even the times when it is really really hard.
Eight years ago, I was working in Memphis and it had been a really rough day. You know the kind of day where you find yourself on job search websites thinking surely there is something better out there. It was a day when payroll was being reduced (again) and the expectations of the job were being increased (again). I found myself, that day, under the microscope of my boss. Pressure was being put on him so he, in turn, was putting the hammer down on me.
I was angry, tired, bitter and feeling very unappreciated. I was very happy that day when my boss told me he was leaving early. As soon as his feet hit the parking lot I went to my office sat down at my computer and began typing an email. It was a nasty email full of rants about the job but mostly criticism about my boss. My co-worker was off that day and I needed to fill him in on just how horrible our boss was being and how frustrating the day had been. After several nasty paragraphs I felt better and I hit send. I grabbed my things and left for the day.
My husband and I had just sat down to dinner when my phone started ringing. It was my boss, ugh! I say "hello" he says "we need to talk about this email you sent me." My heart starts racing, my jaw has hit the floor and sweat is beading on my forehead. I ask "what email" he says "the one about how much you dislike your job and me" I run to the computer pull up my email and check the SENT file. OH MY GOSH!!! I had been thinking about how mad I was at him that I must have typed his name in the address line instead of my coworker. I was panicked, terrified and sick!! I jump in the car and head to work terrified of what is about to happen.
Upon arrival into my boss's office I am greeted with a smile. I just decide to be as brutally honest as possible. I tell him that the email was intended for someone else, I tell him that it had been a horrible day and that there was no excuse for the nasty email. I tell him I am sorry. His response and reaction were calm. He grinned big and said that he was glad he got the email. He said it made him realize he had some things to work on and that he and I needed to work on communication better. He told me that he forgave me.
Eight years later and still I am stunned. I could have easily lost my job or been reprimanded in some way but instead I was offered forgiveness and grace. I was humiliated and embarrassed but I walked away knowing what it felt like to be forgiven of something that I didn't deserve forgiveness for. The experience has caused me to have a heart to forgive often and to love much. It has also caused me to choose my words a little more wisely and always, always make sure I am sending my email to the right person, ha! Seriously though, we are all undeserved yet we are forgiven. Today and everyday, remember to forgive those that hurt you even the times when it is really really hard.
Tuesday, April 14, 2015
When Will Enough Be Enough?
While I was still pregnant with my second child I was already devising a plan to get to my goal weight once the baby was born. As many people told me, losing the weight the second time is a little more difficult. Not sure if it is because of a second pregnancy or because I was a little older but what people told me was true. It took me around 9 months the second time and I was strict with my diet and exercise. I was stuck 3 pounds above my goal weight for about two months. I remember I would think if I can just hit my goal number I will be so happy.
The week that I finally reached my goal weight I was excited! I even took a picture and sent it to my husband. I think he was excited to not have to hear me complaining about it anymore. Much to his and my disappointment, I found myself, not even a day after reaching my goal, wondering if I would be happier if I could lose another 3-5 pounds. A question comes to my mind
"when will enough ever be enough?"
I look at my three year old daughter, watch her as she twirls around in her swimsuit. She proudly proclaims "look at me! I am on the dancing show!" She is referring to Dancing With The Stars. She says "mommy put your swimsuit on and dance with me you can be on the dancing show too." Now I don't know about you but the last time I looked my body is far from looking as tight and amazing as one of the dancers. In my young girls words there is so much confidence, so much sincerity.
She hasn't hit the awkward stage of middle school where you hate your body and the way you look. She sees all people the same and she doesn't even care about a number on a scale. She teaches me lessons everyday. Today the lesson is that joy comes from the love around me and the security in that. So much to my own surprise I go put on my swimsuit and we dance. If I am honest I said a prayer or two that the UPS man wouldn't come knock on the door! ha!
Today may we all choose to love ourselves and our bodies. If it is hard to do for ourselves than may we do it for our children. Don't let children think that happiness must come from a number on a scale or a certain size jean. Today let enough be enough!
The week that I finally reached my goal weight I was excited! I even took a picture and sent it to my husband. I think he was excited to not have to hear me complaining about it anymore. Much to his and my disappointment, I found myself, not even a day after reaching my goal, wondering if I would be happier if I could lose another 3-5 pounds. A question comes to my mind
"when will enough ever be enough?"
I look at my three year old daughter, watch her as she twirls around in her swimsuit. She proudly proclaims "look at me! I am on the dancing show!" She is referring to Dancing With The Stars. She says "mommy put your swimsuit on and dance with me you can be on the dancing show too." Now I don't know about you but the last time I looked my body is far from looking as tight and amazing as one of the dancers. In my young girls words there is so much confidence, so much sincerity.
She hasn't hit the awkward stage of middle school where you hate your body and the way you look. She sees all people the same and she doesn't even care about a number on a scale. She teaches me lessons everyday. Today the lesson is that joy comes from the love around me and the security in that. So much to my own surprise I go put on my swimsuit and we dance. If I am honest I said a prayer or two that the UPS man wouldn't come knock on the door! ha!
Today may we all choose to love ourselves and our bodies. If it is hard to do for ourselves than may we do it for our children. Don't let children think that happiness must come from a number on a scale or a certain size jean. Today let enough be enough!
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